People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
operation have a gay friend backfired
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Randomize
