I must be too annoying 4 u.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
