You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
