sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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