distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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