between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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