My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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