Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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