Welp...herpes.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Randomize
