put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
