She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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