Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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