Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
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The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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