just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
