is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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