All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
