this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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