i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
