i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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