Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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