She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize