If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize