Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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