How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
