haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
