Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
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