i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
