what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
