Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Less talking, more tequila
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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