Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize