Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize