this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
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