I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
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