Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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