false alarm. still invincible.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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