i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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