walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
this hospital has no fireball
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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