i don't like sucking hair
You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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