I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
i out mim tonsoeep
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