Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
