so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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