16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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