Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
