So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
