it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
