Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
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