you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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