I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
