By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
