found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
foreskin is a definite game changer
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
