I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
