i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
